Over the years working in fostering, one group of people has quietly stayed with me, not because they make a fuss, but because they rarely do.
They’re not the ones coming into care. They’re not the ones filling in forms or sitting in meetings. But they are right there, every single day, living it too.
These are the birth children in fostering families, both young and grown. The foster siblings. The quiet heroes.
When a new child comes into a home, it’s a big transition for everyone. And while we (rightly) surround the foster child with care and support, it’s easy to forget that the children already in the family, whether they’re still at home or have flown the nest, are on a journey of their own.
Foster siblings, of all ages:
- Share their home, their routines, and their parents’ attention
- Witness trauma they may not fully understand
- Form strong bonds, only to face painful goodbyes
- Carry big emotions they don’t always have words for
- Offer wisdom, reassurance, or a listening ear based on their own experience
And through it all, they often do what they’ve always done; they get on with it. But that doesn’t mean they’re unaffected. Their feelings, their needs, and their role in fostering matter too.
Fostering impacts the whole family. And we’ve seen how powerful it is when birth children, both young and adult, feel included, supported, and truly valued. They’re not just “coping” with fostering, they’re part of it. They help create the safe, loving home every foster child deserves.
How Our Agency Supports Birth Children
We care deeply about the experience of foster siblings and make a conscious effort to include and support them, regardless of age. Here’s what that looks like in practice:
Checking In on Everyone
Our Supervising Social Workers (SSWs) always try to include birth children in their regular visits, whether they’re still living at home or popping in to support. We ask how they’re doing, not as an afterthought, but because we genuinely want to know.
Extra Support When It’s Needed
If a child or young adult needs more support, we can involve our amazing mentors and therapeutic consultants. Whether it’s space to talk, help processing a goodbye, or just feeling a little more seen, we’re here.
Inclusion in Activities and Events
Birth children are invited to our agency’s activities and celebrations. That includes teens, little ones, and even adult children who remain closely connected to their fostering family. They’re not “tagging along”, they’re part of the fostering family, and they belong at the heart of it.
To the Quiet Heroes…
To every child, teenager, or adult who has made room, physically and emotionally, for a foster sibling: ‘You are incredible!’
We know it’s not always easy.
We know it can be confusing, emotional, and sometimes overwhelming.
But we see the kindness you show.
We see the patience, the sharing, the quiet understanding.
Whether you’re still at home or now supporting from a distance, you matter.
You might not shout it from the rooftops, but what you do makes a difference. More than you probably realise.
You help make fostering possible.
You help make healing happen.
And we’re so, so grateful for you.
Nicky Challen-Probert
Team Manager
If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.
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