As a therapeutic foster carer, one of the most important parts of welcoming a child into their new home is preparing their bedroom. This is because we are helping them create a safe space, and it is likely to be the first place they’ll begin to feel that this house might just be a home, their new home.
I have had both experiences where children have joined my family home with very little, or sometimes with nothing at all, where they have been placed in an emergency. Equally, I have cared for children where there was a planned transition. Irrespective of how they have joined the family, they are often experiencing a wealth of emotions, and they may also feel frightened, excited, uncertain, or even resistant to being here. That’s why their bedroom isn’t just about furniture—it’s about creating a sense of safety, belonging, and dignity.
Here are some things I’ve learned about setting up a bedroom for a foster child in a way that’s both therapeutic and welcoming:
1. Start with the Basics: A Clean, Calm Space
Before anything else, I make sure the room is clean, uncluttered, and calm. Fresh bedding, dusted surfaces, and a neutral colour scheme create a gentle, soothing environment. Children may be coming from chaotic situations, so keeping their space calm—not overwhelming—is really important.
2. Offer Comfort Through Familiarity
If I have been able to have an introduction with a child beforehand, I will always ask them their favourite colour and what their interests are, so this can help me think about furnishings. This is one of the small touches that is important to consider when deciding what foster children need.
I like to include soft touches such as an extra blanket and a couple of cushions. Sometimes I’ll add a teddy or soft toy on the bed—but I never assume they’ll want it. Some children cling to a comfort object straight away; others reject it. The key is offering, not forcing.
3. Keep it Personal—But Not Prescriptive
I don’t over-decorate the room in my taste, because the space needs to grow with the child as they decorate it themselves. This balance, providing a foundation while allowing choice, is central to therapeutic foster care home preparation.
I’ll often put up a pinboard with a welcome note or card or leave a shelf empty, so they have space to add photos, drawings, or little treasures when they’re ready.
It has also been helpful with some children (dependent on age, emotional well-being, how they’ve joined, etc) to enable them to have some choice and autonomy, such as I may support them to pick a bedspread or we have gone to Ikea together so they can get some personal bits for their room.
4. Think Safety First
Therapeutic fostering means being extra mindful of safety. I avoid anything with sharp edges, fragile ornaments, or overwhelming amounts of clutter. Depending on the child’s age and needs, I might limit things and ensure that there are no breakable lamps or heavy mirrors. You can also buy glass safety film if appropriate.
One of my young people, when she became distressed, would tear up her photographs, but once she had calmed down, she would become very upset that her precious photos had been ruined, so we started to laminate them. It was also important for her that her photos were not in glass frames. Safety helps them feel secure.
5. Small Gestures Go a Long Way
I’ve learned that small, thoughtful touches can mean the world and help a child feel seen and cared for. I always have additional toiletries for the child or young person, which may include shampoo, toothpaste, a hairbrush, and sanitary items, as there have been circumstances where a child has only turned up in their school uniform.
Equally, some children may not feel comfortable to express when they join what they do and do not have, so just having it available to them is helpful until you learn their preferences.
These gestures may seem small, but they’re powerful in making a foster child feel at home.
Ascent also provide each child who joins an Ascent family with a welcome box which has a note and several little gift gestures in it – being held in mind can go a long way for our children.
6. Respect Their Privacy
When children arrive, they often feel like their whole life is on display to strangers. Their room needs to feel private while balancing the need to keep them safe. I make sure they have a door they can close, some drawers or a wardrobe to keep their belongings, and reassurance that this is their space.
I always let children know if and why I may need to enter their room, for example, if they need support tidying it up and the importance of knocking before entering.
7. Be Ready to Adapt
I will always let the child know that the room on day one is never the finished product, and in time, we will help it feel like and become their space. Each child is unique and different, some will want to paint, others will want posters of their favourite shows, or some prefer it plain and simple. One of the children I cared for had experienced multiple foster homes before coming to me, and so he did not want to personalise his room when he first came. It took over a year for him to feel safe and secure, and therefore, being patient and understanding of his inner world was central. Now, when I walk passed his bedroom, I feel so proud because it really feels like his space!
Final Thoughts
Preparing a bedroom for a foster child isn’t about making it Pinterest-perfect. It’s about creating a space that says: “You are safe here. You are welcome here. You belong here.”
Sometimes, that message is felt most strongly not in the furniture or the colour of the walls, but in the small details—the soft blanket folded on the end of the bed, the toothbrush waiting in the bathroom, the knowledge that someone thought about them before they even arrived. That’s what turns a bedroom into a refuge—and a house into a home.
Here is a practical bedroom checklist for foster carers:
Essentials (must-haves):
- Bed, clean mattress, and waterproof protector
- Fresh duvet, pillows, and bedding
- Wardrobe or chest of drawers
- Bedside table or surface
- Reading lamp/light (sturdy and safe)
- Curtains or blinds
- Waste bin
Comfort & Care Items (to help them settle):
- Spare blankets or throws
- A couple of cushions
- A soft toy (optional, but available)
- Basic toiletries (toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, soap, hairbrush, sanitary products)
- Nightlight or LED strips can be helpful for some children who may feel anxious, scared at nighttime or who are afraid of the dark
- If they are joining in an emergency, it is helpful to purchase a pack of new underwear and socks
Personalisation & Extras (to give choice):
- Pinboard, magnetic board, or wall-safe sticky hooks for posters/photos
- Journal, colouring book, or notebook
- Pens, pencils, crayons, depending on age
- Small clock or alarm (some children like the routine it provides)
- A basket or box they can use as a “special things” drawer
Optional Therapeutic Touches:
- Weighted blanket (if recommended for sensory needs)
- Fidget toys or stress balls
- Calm-down jar or sensory bottle
- A shelf or box labelled “safe space” for them to keep private items
By an Ascent Foster Parent
If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.
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