News

One of the most common questions people ask when considering fostering is: “Do foster carers get paid?”

The simple answer is yes, foster carers do receive financial support. Fostering is an incredibly rewarding role, but it also comes with real responsibilities and costs. To make sure carers can provide a stable, nurturing home without being out of pocket, foster parents receive a fostering allowance and may also benefit from tax relief and access to certain benefits.

At Ascent, we believe foster carers should be properly supported, both emotionally and financially, so they can focus on what truly matters: providing excellent care to children and young people.

Understanding Fostering Allowances

Foster carers receive a weekly fostering allowance for each child in their care, which Ascent pay fortnightly. This allowance is designed to cover the costs of caring for the child, including:

• Food and clothing
• Transport to school, appointments, family time, or activities
• Pocket money and hobbies
• Household expenses
• Special occasions and celebrations

At Ascent, our fostering allowances are designed to reflect the real costs of caring for children, ensuring that our carers are never financially disadvantaged for the incredible work they do. As we are a therapeutic fostering agency, our fees reflect the complexity and wrap-around support we provide to the foster carer, child and professional network.

Tax Relief for Foster Carers

Foster carers benefit from a special tax scheme introduced by HMRC called Qualifying Care Relief. This makes the tax process straightforward and often means that carers pay little or no tax on their fostering income.

Under this scheme:

• You can earn up to a set tax-free allowance each year for your fostering work (currently £18,140 per household, plus an additional weekly amount for each child in your care).
• If your fostering income stays below this threshold, you don’t need to pay tax on it.
• Even if you earn more, you’ll only pay tax on the amount above the allowance.

This system recognises the valuable service foster carers provide and ensures fostering remains financially sustainable for families.

Benefits and Additional Financial Support

Foster carers may also be eligible for certain state benefits, depending on their circumstances. These could include:

• Child Benefit: Usually not paid for foster children (since the fostering allowance replaces it).
• Universal Credit: Foster carers can usually claim Universal Credit for themselves, but the fostering allowance isn’t counted as income when calculating entitlement.
• Council Tax Reduction: Depending on your income and local authority, you might qualify for a reduction.

Each carer’s situation is unique, so at Ascent, all our foster carers are registered with Foster Talk, who are able to offer independent support and advice on fostering finances.

Fostering Is Not Just About Money — But Support Matters

While financial support is an important part of fostering, most carers will tell you that the true rewards are emotional rather than monetary — seeing a child grow in confidence, smile again, and feel safe for the first time.

Still, we know that practical support matters. That’s why Ascent provides clear information about allowances, pays on time, and ensures that our carers are never left uncertain about what they’re entitled to.

In addition to allowances, we offer a robust support, including support from a qualified social worker, a Therapeutic Consultant, an Out of Hours service, Stay over Breaks (sometimes known as respite), training and events.

At Ascent, we value the work our foster carers do and ensure they’re supported in every way — financially, emotionally, and professionally. If you’re thinking about becoming a foster carer and want to understand more about the financial support available, our team is always happy to explain how it works and what you can expect.

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

Partnership Working through a lens of working with Developmental Trauma

Current policy and practice around looked-after children stresses that a central aspect of social work practice to achieve meeting the needs of looked-after children is building relationships and collaborating with professionals from diverse backgrounds. This is due to the multiple and complex needs of looked-after children, which require various skills, lenses, people, and professions.

A looked-after child’s social worker is often the lead professional in the network that works around the children we care for, and it is the responsibility of the local authority to assess a child’s needs for services and prepare a care plan that supports a child’s development and progress. The plan must consider permanency and arrangements to meet the child’s health, educational, as well as their emotional and behavioural development, identity, and cultural background, with particular regard to their religious, racial, and linguistic origins.

The plan also involves others, such as policymakers, local leaders, commissioners, professionals, and caregivers, all of whom have a duty of care. It is also our job to critically reflect, advocate, and consider the child’s needs, experiences, and interests, which should be at the centre of decision-making that is about them. This can be a challenging job and can feel like it has enormous implications for the child you are working with or caring for.

An essential factor in social work practice is making best-interest, child-centred decisions that align with a child’s wishes and feelings, where possible. Understanding the wishes and feelings of any child can be a challenge; however, when complex trauma occurs, it brings further complexities to communicating and being understood. Complex trauma occurs when an individual has been exposed to multiple traumatic events that have immediate consequences and long-term outcomes. When complex trauma happens in childhood, it can disrupt a child’s development, which is referred to as Developmental Trauma (DT).

Schore (2009) researched the interpersonal neurobiology of trauma, proposing that a person’s early experiences of abuse and neglect can go on to impact their biological structure and the functioning of the brain and nervous system across the course of their lifespan. Identifying that attachment trauma is particularly harmful in disrupting the developmental trajectory of the brain/mind/body systems. The impact of interrelation harm is also about the neurological developmental opportunities the brain is missing out on. It is through healthy interpersonal communication that brain growth and development are stimulated. Particularly, the development of self-regulation processes that stabilise the mind to be open, objective, and communicate effectively about internal and external realities.

Schore (2009) indicates that children who have experienced complex trauma may struggle to relate to us (i.e., professionals) in a way that helps to understand their experience. This means that interrupting behaviours and understanding hidden needs are key to responding appropriately to needs within care planning. Due to the children’s complex histories, more time may be necessary to develop a relationship in which the children’s defences could be lowered and their internal world can be understood. To advocate for and create a care plan in a child’s best interest, while considering their true wishes and feelings, requires time, consistency, and building a relationship. Part of the Therapeutic Consultant’s role at Ascent is to also work with the professional network to be curious about the child’s inner world and understand how their early life experiences have shaped or influenced how they perceive or interact with the world. And therefore, help the professionals network, including the foster parents, to think about how we support them.

At Ascent, we are passionate about hearing our children’s voices. There are many ways in which we support our children in having different platforms to express their views. This may be at their education or review meetings with the support of their foster parents, mentors or therapists. We also enable our young people to shape Ascent services and provisions through our annual Children’s Consultation and Youth Council.

Ravalier et al.’s (2020) research into social care identified that a key contribution to stress for social workers was connected to case allocation, the complexity of cases, coupled with the increase in paperwork, which then hindered their ability to have the time to build meaningful relationships and complete direct work to inform decision-making. This research demonstrates the importance of how, as part of the professional network supporting the foster family and child, we build these key relationships, where connection can occur and a child’s internal world can be seen (i.e., unspoken fears, competing desires, or quiet struggles). Accordingly, this will help facilitate care plans that are tailored to meet individual needs. Therefore, at Ascent, our therapeutic thinking enables us to reflect and explore as a network some of the challenges, but also work together to enable a child to thrive.

It can be challenging, as well as rewarding, to work with people who have experienced complex trauma. It may involve a lot of firefighting and may, at times, feel relentless. This is often because a child is usually attached to many dysfunctional systems. Remembering that this is a systemic issue and taking the time to pay attention to how it could be impacting you as a foster parent or professional, you’re loved ones, and your environment is essential. Reflective practice is a crucial part of this, and at Ascent, each Therapeutic Consultant will meet with foster parents and Supervising Social Workers to reflect on the presenting needs and challenges the network, or the child, may be facing and think through how to overcome these. We also encourage and promote the importance of prioritising self-care, as it is critical for anyone working with complex trauma to maintain balance and prevent burnout.

Josephina Thomas, Therapeutic Consultant

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

Autumn Reflections at Ascent by Mark Pomell, Managing Director

The autumn months in fostering are all about helping our children and carers settle back into school life. It’s also about supporting our young people to reconnect, encouraging them to build friendships, join clubs, and feel part of something bigger. We know that when young people develop strong friendship groups early on, they’re better equipped to sustain lasting, healthy relationships later in life.

After summer, there’s always a flurry of family time to manage and support. This can be an anxious period for some children and families, but it’s a crucial part of maintaining identity and connection. At Ascent, we take pride in doing this well, ensuring that family time feels safe, meaningful, and supported.

Building community is everything to us. Helping young people stay engaged in school and feel connected to others underpins everything we do. The fostering team works incredibly hard behind the scenes, coordinating looked-after reviews, personal education plan meetings, and foster carers’ annual reviews, alongside the day-to-day support that keeps placements strong. Autumn is always a busy stretch as we prepare for the run-up to Christmas.

Personally, this is also the time when I start looking ahead, planning for the new year and meeting with my senior team to set priorities and make sure we have the right resources in place to start strong. Building relationships and community continues to sit at the heart of what we do. This year, we’ve been thinking about ways to deepen the connections within our carer group and with the young people we support.

The upcoming October half-term will see a two-day event focused on independence, self-care, and wellness for our young people. We’re really excited to have the support of Donna Dia, founder of The Beauty Beat, who has kindly provided self-care gifts to encourage confidence and wellbeing. A huge thank you to Donna and her team for helping us make this happen.

Mark Pomell, Managing Director

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

Becoming a foster carer is a rewarding and life-changing journey. Many people ask: How long does it take to foster a child? At Ascent Fostering Agency, we guide you through every step, making the process clear, manageable, and supportive. From your first enquiry to welcoming your first child, we’re with you every step of the way.

The Approval Process

Here’s what the journey looks like when you foster with Ascent:

1. Initial Enquiry & Assessment

If you’re interested in fostering, your first step is to enquire about your space and availability. If suitable, an initial assessment visit takes place at your home. This visit, which can last up to 2 hours, provides more information about Ascent, inspects your home for suitability, and gives you plenty of time to ask questions. Our goal is to help you make an informed decision and feel confident about whether fostering is right for you and what type of fostering is best.

2. Meeting the Directors

Next, you’ll be invited to our office for an informal meeting with our Directors. This is a chance to get a feel for the agency and its culture. We want Ascent to feel right for you, just as much as you need to feel right for us.

3. Application & Background Checks

If you decide to move forward, you’ll complete an application form. We then carry out all necessary background checks to ensure the safety and wellbeing of children placed in your care.

4. Training & Form F Assessment

Prospective carers complete Skills to Foster training and the detailed Form F assessment. During this stage:

You will also have a session with our Therapeutic Consultant, giving you insight into therapeutic parenting and helping you understand the emotional needs of children.

You will be assigned a foster carer mentor, an experienced carer who shares their lived experience, offering guidance and support before and after approval.

5. Fostering Panel & Approval

Your assessment is reviewed by an independent fostering panel and signed off by the Agency Decision Maker (ADM). Once approved, you officially become a foster carer with Ascent.

6. Comprehensive Induction

Once you’re approved, you’ll take part in a full induction. This covers training on CHARMS, record keeping and our agency policies. The aim is simple, to give you the knowledge and confidence to provide safe and supportive care from day one.

Timeline: Most carers finish this stage in about 3 months. In more complex situations, it can take a little longer.

Welcoming Your First Child

After approval, Ascent works carefully to match you with a child whose needs fit your skills and experience. Where possible, we arrange introductions to help both you and the child settle in. Sometimes placements can happen at short notice but we always share as much information as possible so you can make an informed choice.

Time from approval to first placement: Usually a few weeks to a few months, depending on the child’s needs and availability.

Age Requirements

You must be at least 21 years old to foster with Ascent, but there’s no strict upper age limit. We focus more on your health, energy, and ability to meet a child’s needs.

Fostering with Ascent Fostering Agency combines guidance, mentorship, and practical support. With our structured approval process, therapeutic insight, and induction program, you can confidently take the first step toward making a lasting difference in a child’s life.

Nicky Probert-Challen, Team Manager

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

An interesting part of Ascent is how we support matching and the placement of children with our foster parents. One of the questions I’m often asked by prospective or new foster parents is: “How does the matching process really work, and what choices do I have as a foster parent?”

It’s a very valid question. Whether a child is coming into care for the first time or is needing to move from another foster home, there can be urgency and uncertainty—but there is also a need to put a lot of thought and care into making sure the right child is placed in the right home.

Matching is not about perfection (there’s no such thing as a perfect match), but it is about fit—fit for the child, and fit for the foster parent and their household. This is why the child placement process is approached with sensitivity and careful planning.

What Do We Mean by “Matching”?

Matching is the process of identifying a foster family that can best meet a child’s needs. Every child has their own early life experiences, needs, strengths, and challenges they need support in overcoming. Therefore, when a Local Authority approaches Ascent with a child that needs a foster home, we work closely with them and that child’s network (this includes, but is not exhaustive of, the placing officer, the child’s social worker, the child’s educational provision and key people in the child’s life). We think carefully about all these factors and consider which foster families, from their skills and experience to their family dynamics, are best placed to provide a safe and nurturing home.

Whilst it is important to think about the practical elements like the number of bedrooms or where they attend school, it’s also about ensuring we find the right match between foster parent and child, and that a child’s emotional needs, identity, trauma history, attachment styles, and personality are all considered.

This includes considering emotional needs, identity, trauma history, attachment styles, and personality when making foster care placement decisions. In many ways, this part of matching is similar to a foster family assessment, where we look at both the child’s needs and the foster family’s capacity to provide care.

What Information does a foster parent receive?

At Ascent, we work closely with the Local Authority to learn as much about the child as we possibly can so we can ensure the right match for both child and foster parent. Before a child is placed, you will receive a ‘referral’, which should provide a detailed description of the child. This will include:

• Age, gender, and cultural background
• Health needs and routines, hobbies
• Education history and current school provision
• Known behaviours, triggers, and support strategies
• Family time arrangements
• Any risks to consider (for example, running away or self-harm)

We will also ask for other information, such as school reports, chronologies, and care plans, and you will be able to think through with your Supervising Social Worker (SSW) and Therapeutic Consultant about the match.

The Role of Therapeutic Thinking in Matching

Therapeutic fostering requires us to look beyond the presenting behaviours a child may be displaying. As Ascent is a therapeutic fostering agency, we are keen to understand the why behind some behaviours. For example, a child who hoards food isn’t being “naughty”—they may have experienced neglect and are responding from a place of survival.

Therefore, when we’re matching, we’re not just asking: “Can this carer manage this behaviour?” but, “Can this carer offer the relational safety this child needs?” “Do they have the patience and capacity to co-regulate through big emotions?” and “Does their family environment give the child the best chance to heal?” We do not expect foster parents to be therapists but to be curious and use the two hands of therapeutic parenting; one hand, a foster parent is using boundaries, structure and routine and in the other, warmth, nurture and empathy.

What choices do foster parents have?

As a foster parent, you always have a choice. Matching is a conversation, not a one-way decision. You are never forced to accept caring for a child or young person. Saying yes or no is not about being “good” or “bad” at fostering—it’s about being honest about what’s possible for you and your household. Therefore, part of the matching process is an open conversation with your Supervising Social Worker (SSW) about the following elements:

• Capacity: Do you have the physical space, time, and energy right now? How would you balance the needs of the child alongside your existing lifestyle and commitments?
• Family dynamics: How might this child’s needs impact your own children, other foster children you are caring for or other household members?
• Skills and experience: Do you feel equipped to meet the child’s needs? What previous experience could you draw upon, or transferable skills, which would enable you to care for the child?
• Support networks: What support do you need? Who in your network can offer backup support or overnight stays? What training, resources or professional support from your SSW or Therapeutic Consultant would you benefit from?

Sometimes, foster parents worry about saying no, but from my perspective, I value honesty, and I want every foster family to feel confident when they agree to care for a child. This does not mean that they won’t feel challenged or stretched at times, but it is within a foster parent’s capacity with the wrap-around support Ascent provide.

Final Thoughts

Matching is at the heart of fostering. It’s not always easy, and sometimes a child being placed in a foster family can happen quickly, but there is always thought, care, and therapeutic understanding behind the process.

As a foster parent, your role is not just to provide a bed—it’s to provide stability, nurture, and hope. And your choices matter. By working together—social workers, foster parents, and local authorities—we can create matches that give children not just safety, but the chance to begin healing and thriving.

By Sita Alexander, Fostering Director

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

As a therapeutic foster carer, one of the most important parts of welcoming a child into their new home is preparing their bedroom. This is because we are helping them create a safe space, and it is likely to be the first place they’ll begin to feel that this house might just be a home, their new home.

I have had both experiences where children have joined my family home with very little, or sometimes with nothing at all, where they have been placed in an emergency. Equally, I have cared for children where there was a planned transition. Irrespective of how they have joined the family, they are often experiencing a wealth of emotions, and they may also feel frightened, excited, uncertain, or even resistant to being here. That’s why their bedroom isn’t just about furniture—it’s about creating a sense of safety, belonging, and dignity.

Here are some things I’ve learned about setting up a bedroom for a foster child in a way that’s both therapeutic and welcoming:

1. Start with the Basics: A Clean, Calm Space

Before anything else, I make sure the room is clean, uncluttered, and calm. Fresh bedding, dusted surfaces, and a neutral colour scheme create a gentle, soothing environment. Children may be coming from chaotic situations, so keeping their space calm—not overwhelming—is really important.

2. Offer Comfort Through Familiarity

If I have been able to have an introduction with a child beforehand, I will always ask them their favourite colour and what their interests are, so this can help me think about furnishings. This is one of the small touches that is important to consider when deciding what foster children need.

I like to include soft touches such as an extra blanket and a couple of cushions. Sometimes I’ll add a teddy or soft toy on the bed—but I never assume they’ll want it. Some children cling to a comfort object straight away; others reject it. The key is offering, not forcing.

3. Keep it Personal—But Not Prescriptive

I don’t over-decorate the room in my taste, because the space needs to grow with the child as they decorate it themselves. This balance, providing a foundation while allowing choice, is central to therapeutic foster care home preparation.
I’ll often put up a pinboard with a welcome note or card or leave a shelf empty, so they have space to add photos, drawings, or little treasures when they’re ready.

It has also been helpful with some children (dependent on age, emotional well-being, how they’ve joined, etc) to enable them to have some choice and autonomy, such as I may support them to pick a bedspread or we have gone to Ikea together so they can get some personal bits for their room.

4. Think Safety First

Therapeutic fostering means being extra mindful of safety. I avoid anything with sharp edges, fragile ornaments, or overwhelming amounts of clutter. Depending on the child’s age and needs, I might limit things and ensure that there are no breakable lamps or heavy mirrors. You can also buy glass safety film if appropriate.

One of my young people, when she became distressed, would tear up her photographs, but once she had calmed down, she would become very upset that her precious photos had been ruined, so we started to laminate them. It was also important for her that her photos were not in glass frames. Safety helps them feel secure.

5. Small Gestures Go a Long Way

I’ve learned that small, thoughtful touches can mean the world and help a child feel seen and cared for. I always have additional toiletries for the child or young person, which may include shampoo, toothpaste, a hairbrush, and sanitary items, as there have been circumstances where a child has only turned up in their school uniform.

Equally, some children may not feel comfortable to express when they join what they do and do not have, so just having it available to them is helpful until you learn their preferences.

These gestures may seem small, but they’re powerful in making a foster child feel at home.

Ascent also provide each child who joins an Ascent family with a welcome box which has a note and several little gift gestures in it – being held in mind can go a long way for our children.

6. Respect Their Privacy

When children arrive, they often feel like their whole life is on display to strangers. Their room needs to feel private while balancing the need to keep them safe. I make sure they have a door they can close, some drawers or a wardrobe to keep their belongings, and reassurance that this is their space.

I always let children know if and why I may need to enter their room, for example, if they need support tidying it up and the importance of knocking before entering.

7. Be Ready to Adapt

I will always let the child know that the room on day one is never the finished product, and in time, we will help it feel like and become their space. Each child is unique and different, some will want to paint, others will want posters of their favourite shows, or some prefer it plain and simple. One of the children I cared for had experienced multiple foster homes before coming to me, and so he did not want to personalise his room when he first came. It took over a year for him to feel safe and secure, and therefore, being patient and understanding of his inner world was central. Now, when I walk passed his bedroom, I feel so proud because it really feels like his space!

Final Thoughts

Preparing a bedroom for a foster child isn’t about making it Pinterest-perfect. It’s about creating a space that says: “You are safe here. You are welcome here. You belong here.”

Sometimes, that message is felt most strongly not in the furniture or the colour of the walls, but in the small details—the soft blanket folded on the end of the bed, the toothbrush waiting in the bathroom, the knowledge that someone thought about them before they even arrived. That’s what turns a bedroom into a refuge—and a house into a home.

Here is a practical bedroom checklist for foster carers:

Essentials (must-haves):

• Bed, clean mattress, and waterproof protector
• Fresh duvet, pillows, and bedding
• Wardrobe or chest of drawers
• Bedside table or surface
• Reading lamp/light (sturdy and safe)
• Curtains or blinds
• Waste bin

Comfort & Care Items (to help them settle):

• Spare blankets or throws
• A couple of cushions
• A soft toy (optional, but available)
• Basic toiletries (toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, soap, hairbrush, sanitary products)
• Nightlight or LED strips can be helpful for some children who may feel anxious, scared at nighttime or who are afraid of the dark
• If they are joining in an emergency, it is helpful to purchase a pack of new underwear and socks

Personalisation & Extras (to give choice):

• Pinboard, magnetic board, or wall-safe sticky hooks for posters/photos
• Journal, colouring book, or notebook
• Pens, pencils, crayons, depending on age
• Small clock or alarm (some children like the routine it provides)
• A basket or box they can use as a “special things” drawer

Optional Therapeutic Touches:

• Weighted blanket (if recommended for sensory needs)
• Fidget toys or stress balls
• Calm-down jar or sensory bottle
• A shelf or box labelled “safe space” for them to keep private items

By an Ascent Foster Parent

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

Children who have experienced trauma often find it difficult to articulate or name their feelings and traditional therapy can sometimes feel too overwhelming.

Healing doesn’t always begin with words.

Sometimes, it begins with a nudge from a therapy dog, the steady grooming of a pony, the stroking of a cat or a rabbit curled quietly in a child’s lap.

That’s the gentle, evidence-based power of animal-assisted therapy (AAT).

🧠 Why It Works: The Science of Connection

Animals as Therapy is supported by compelling neuroscience:

• Oxytocin (“the bonding hormone”) is released through nurturing touch, helping a child feel safe and soothed

• Cortisol, the stress hormone, decreases with animal interaction—reducing anxiety and emotional flooding

• Co-regulation occurs when a child subconsciously mirrors the calm breathing and presence of a therapy animal, helping them regulate their own emotions

“Animal-assisted therapy provides a safe space for children to explore trust, develop empathy, and reconnect to their senses—all without having to say a word.”
— Dr. Sam Carr, University of Bath

🧷 Attachment to Animals: A Safe Haven for Healing

Attachment theory tells us that early relationships shape how we love, trust, and manage emotions. For children who have experienced trauma, those attachment templates are often fractured.

Animals can offer a unique path to repair:

• Unconditional acceptance – Connection without judgment or expectation

• Safe haven & secure base – Emotional refuge and confidence to explore

• Nonverbal communication – Comfort through presence, not pressure

“Animals provide a judgment-free, stable relationship that offers neither betrayal nor emotional ambiguity.”
— Psychologs

The secure attachment a child may form with a therapy animal can be the first step toward rebuilding trust in relationships.

🌀 Circle of Security & Animals: A Shared Language of Safety

The Circle of Security is a caregiving model that helps children feel secure enough to explore the world—and safe enough to return when they need comfort. Therapy animals often reflect this cycle beautifully:

• As a secure base, they encourage confidence to take emotional or social risks

• As a safe haven, they provide calm and grounding when the world feels overwhelming

• Through simple “being with”, they offer attunement without judgment

“Whether it’s a baby reaching for their parent or a puppy nudging your hand for reassurance, the drive for connection runs deep. This isn’t just a human thing—it’s a mammal thing.”
— Circle of Security International

🐾 Real Lives, Real Impact – Amazing Animals

These stories show how animals support emotional recovery and create safe relationships for children who have experienced trauma:

• Amira & Toby – After multiple failed placements, Amira whispered, “He’s the only one who doesn’t leave.”
  🔗 Read more
• Eli & Sunshine – A withdrawn boy found calm simply by sitting beside a therapy rabbit
  🔗 Read more
• Rani & Blaze – After domestic violence, Rani found emotional safety in grooming and caring for a pony
  🔗 Read more
• Daisy the Hospital Hero – Lifted a young cancer patient’s spirits during treatment
  🔗 Read more
• Bailey the Rescue Dog – Anchored a man’s recovery from addiction
  🔗 Read more
• Takoda the Gentle Giant – Provided stress relief to students through campus visits
  🔗 Read more
• Moose the Rescue – Offered calm and care to patients and students in high-stress settings
  🔗 Read more
• Mrs. Thompson & the Memory Dogs – Reignited speech and joy in a woman with dementia
  🔗 Read more

📍 Accessing Animal-Assisted Therapy in the UK

These trusted organisations offer therapy sessions and animal-assisted experiences—many based in Surrey or the South East:

You can ask your supervising social worker, Virtual School head, or SEND team about referral routes and funding options for AAT in your area.

🐕 Final Thoughts

For children who have experienced trauma, a therapy animal may be the first safe connection they’ve ever known. The kind that doesn’t expect perfection or explanations—just presence.

Animal-assisted therapy doesn’t erase the past. But it offers a doorway to healing, trust, and emotional repair. Sometimes, it begins with the wag of a tail, or a paw held out.

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

As a Supervising Social Worker, one of the most powerful dynamics I witness is when foster carers work in partnership with birth families. It’s not always easy, in fact, for many foster carers, the idea of building a relationship with a child’s birth parents can be one of the most daunting aspects of fostering. However, when it works, it can be one of the most transformative and rewarding parts of the journey, especially for the child at the centre of it all.

The challenge and the importance of overcoming it

Working closely with birth families can bring up a wide range of emotions for foster carers. Some may feel anxious or protective of the child, unsure of how to engage with parents who may have struggled to provide safe or consistent care. Others worry about boundaries, allegations, or the emotional toll of becoming involved in sometimes complex family dynamics. I often have carers say that they feel like they are being pulled into the chaos! 

These concerns are completely valid. As professionals, we see the impact of generational trauma, instability, and sadly, we often see poor outcomes for looked-after children in comparison to their peers. But we also see the full picture, including the potential for change, the power of relationships, and the child’s deep-rooted need for connection with their birth families.

For looked-after children, their identity is tied closely to their birth family. No matter the circumstances, most children maintain a psychological bond with their birth parents. When foster carers can respect and promote that connection, children often feel less conflicted, more secure, and more able to settle at home and school.

Building Trust and Rebalancing Power

When a child comes into care, it’s not just the child who experiences loss; their birth parents do too. For many parents, having their child removed from their care feels like they have lost control, authority, and even their sense of identity as a parent. These feelings are often accompanied by feelings of judgement, shame, anger or helplessness. Imagine what it must be like to no longer make the day-to-day decisions for your child, even down to what food they eat and the clothes that they wear. This is where I have seen foster carers have a powerful impact; it’s the simple things, such as asking the parent whether they would like to bring food for their child during family time, and dressing them in outfits their parent may have bought for them. 

Often it’s the smallest gestures that send the biggest message – a warm hello during family time, sharing regular updates or photos, or speaking respectfully and being authentically positive about a child’s parent. Foster carers can help parents feel seen, respected and involved. These small wins can go a long way in building trust and restoring a sense of dignity for birth parents. 

Real Relationships, Real Rewards

When a foster carer shows that they are not trying to replace a parent, it shifts the dynamic completely. It softens resistance, reduces conflict, and allows for the possibility of real collaboration. For the child, seeing the most important adults in their life communicate and cooperate with each other signifies that adults can work together in their best interest. It sends a message to the child that they don’t have to feel conflicted and choose a side, and that they are truly being cared for in a united way. In turn, this can lead to improved behaviour, more secure attachments, and a more stable placement.

I’ve also seen wonderful examples where partnership working leads to smoother transitions back home, better outcomes in education and emotional wellbeing, and even ongoing relationships post-placement. Many foster carers remain a positive presence in a child’s life long after they’ve returned to their family — as mentors, friends, or extended support.

Of course, it’s not always possible or safe to develop close ties with every birth family, and where that’s the case, it’s vital to prioritise boundaries and personal safety of the foster family. But when it is possible, and when foster carers are supported to explore this relationship carefully and professionally, the rewards can be immense.

At Ascent, we recognise how complex this can be. That’s why we offer training, supervision, and hands-on support to help carers navigate these relationships. Whether it’s managing boundaries, preparing for contact, or offering a therapeutic understanding of family dynamics. Working with birth families may not always be straightforward, but when approached with empathy, clear communication, and the right support, it can be one of the most meaningful parts of fostering.

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.

Over the years working in fostering, one group of people has quietly stayed with me, not because they make a fuss, but because they rarely do.

They’re not the ones coming into care. They’re not the ones filling in forms or sitting in meetings. But they are right there, every single day, living it too.

These are the birth children in fostering families, both young and grown. The foster siblings. The quiet heroes.

When a new child comes into a home, it’s a big transition for everyone. And while we (rightly) surround the foster child with care and support, it’s easy to forget that the children already in the family, whether they’re still at home or have flown the nest, are on a journey of their own.

Foster siblings, of all ages:

• Share their home, their routines, and their parents’ attention
• Witness trauma they may not fully understand
• Form strong bonds, only to face painful goodbyes
• Carry big emotions they don’t always have words for
• Offer wisdom, reassurance, or a listening ear based on their own experience

And through it all, they often do what they’ve always done; they get on with it. But that doesn’t mean they’re unaffected. Their feelings, their needs, and their role in fostering matter too.

Fostering impacts the whole family. And we’ve seen how powerful it is when birth children, both young and adult, feel included, supported, and truly valued. They’re not just “coping” with fostering, they’re part of it. They help create the safe, loving home every foster child deserves.

How Our Agency Supports Birth Children

We care deeply about the experience of foster siblings and make a conscious effort to include and support them, regardless of age. Here’s what that looks like in practice:

Checking In on Everyone

Our Supervising Social Workers (SSWs) always try to include birth children in their regular visits, whether they’re still living at home or popping in to support. We ask how they’re doing, not as an afterthought, but because we genuinely want to know.

Extra Support When It’s Needed

If a child or young adult needs more support, we can involve our amazing mentors and therapeutic consultants. Whether it’s space to talk, help processing a goodbye, or just feeling a little more seen, we’re here.

Inclusion in Activities and Events

Birth children are invited to our agency’s activities and celebrations. That includes teens, little ones, and even adult children who remain closely connected to their fostering family. They’re not “tagging along”, they’re part of the fostering family, and they belong at the heart of it.

To the Quiet Heroes…

To every child, teenager, or adult who has made room, physically and emotionally, for a foster sibling: ‘You are incredible!’

We know it’s not always easy.

We know it can be confusing, emotional, and sometimes overwhelming.

But we see the kindness you show.

We see the patience, the sharing, the quiet understanding.

Whether you’re still at home or now supporting from a distance, you matter.

You might not shout it from the rooftops, but what you do makes a difference. More than you probably realise.

You help make fostering possible.

You help make healing happen.

And we’re so, so grateful for you.

Nicky Challen-Probert

Team Manager

If you would like to find out more about fostering and the amazing difference you could make in a young persons life. Give usa call on 0203 757 0070 or click HERE to receive a call back. We’d be happy to answer any questions you may have on fostering and take you through the process.